Meeting

The meeting went well this morning, I was pleased with the outcome and think everyone was keen to do what was best for Ma's interests.

The plan is to review her medication and perhaps look at taking away some of the heavyweight mood drugs, get her off the catheter and hopefully back to continence, get her seen by the nutritionist, arrange a stay in a nursing home before coming home and then have some additional help come in to support me.

Ma was 100% brighter today, far more alert and responsive. I fed her some lunch and while she didn't eat an awful lot of it, she did eat some mashed potato, apple sauce, a few green beans and some ice cream. I think this may be the result of not being given either her sleeping tablets or codeine for a few days. We had quite a laugh too which was wonderful.

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Today's blip is another spring flower, a teeny tiny narcissus. I love their sweet little faces. As usual I agonised over which one to choose as my blip, here are the others.

Update

Another day, another update. Not a great deal to report though. Yesterday she was given two pints of blood to help with the anaemia she has developed as a result of not eating either properly or indeed at all. So although there was little response from her again, her colour was much much better. I managed to get her to drink a little bit of water and the staff said she'd had a bit of soup. But otherwise still very sleepy, unresponsive and unable to keep her eyes open for more than a few seconds. Today was more of the same really without the blood transfusion. I'm genuinely apprehensive about looking after her when she comes home.

Other news... David's condition has improved dramatically since the weekend. He has left the ICU and today there is talk of moving him from the High Dependency Unit to the regular ward tomorrow. Wonderful wonderful news.

H arrives on Saturday and I can't wait to see her. She's struggling a little bit at the moment and definitely needs some Mummy time. And I definitely need some daughter time.

What with Ma, David, Auntie Anne, H and her probs and W phoning me when he's having another one of his headless chicken moments I'm feeling a bit like I'm running on empty.

Another day on

When I got to hospital this afternoon Ma was in a chair but sleeping. Well, I say in a chair - imagine a plank propped against a chair and you get the idea. The nursing staff say that she had some soup last night and has had something to drink today but she's not making it easy. I didn't disturb her sleep and I have to say that she looked much better yesterday than she did today.

I've not had a great day today, I've been a bit weepy off and on. I think all the worry for David and Ma plus my Aunt (Ma's sister, David's mother) is very poorly too, is affecting me. It's all just too much.

Hopefully I'll be less miserable tomorrow.

A bit brighter

Just back from the hospital and Ma is looking a tiny bit brighter, still not really responding to conversation and keeps her eyes shut most of the time. But I did manage to get her to drink one of those little tubs of orange juice you get in hospital (like the ones you get on an aeroplane) and also about 2/3 of a sucky cup filled with tea, so that was a good thing. I had a good chat with the nurses and they said that they are having real difficulties getting her to eat or drink anything, she has a line in to get some fluid into her but of course she keeps pulling it out.

They are hopeful that they will get her sitting in a chair tomorrow which is great.

She's definitely a better colour and less clammy than she was yesterday, so all in all much happier about things.

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Just a photo to add. Obviously the weather was horrible and I did think that I would be at home all day but then Peter decided to stay at home (not unreasonably I might add, I wouldn't want to schlepp across in this weather either) so of course I had to go out to the hospital. However, I'm not sure I would've stopped to find something to photograph anyway... So here is some mint to brighten your day.

Bad news

For those who don't follow me on Facebook or Twitter: pretty much at the exact moment I pressed the publish button on last night's blog post Ma fell in the bedroom and has broken her other hip. Initially I thought she had fallen out of bed but on reflection, from the way she was lying on the floor I am sure that she was already out of bed and had then fallen.

Considering the number of falls she has had recently (and fallen out of bed) there was a certain feeling of inevitablility about this.

After five hours in A&E last night she was transferred to the ward and was going into surgery this morning. I have been told to ring after lunch to see how she is doing.

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In the end it was 4pm before I was able to get any news because she was late, or last, on the list. However in the grand scheme of things this is massively better than last time when she waited days for her operation.

So far so good. She's back from the op and is 'comfortable'. My definition of comfortable is a long way from the NHS version though it has to be said.

I'm hoping that the 'Big Blizzard' will not stop me going to the hospital tomorrow

I went for a walk with Lily and took a few pics but it was unbelievably cold so not a lot of blippage took place. I've posted on Blipfoto but it's not a terribly exciting photo.

Better news tomorrow I hope.

Highs and Lows on a Wednesday

Today didn't have the best start with a full bedding and bed clothes strip required before it was even light. But once that was in the washing machine, Ma had been in the shower and the bedding was drying on the radiators/Aga and daylight was hoving into view, things seemed a lot better all round.

Toast, tea and yet more problems taking tablets followed before the bus arrived at around 10:00am and off she went.

I did some shopping for Betsy and tootled about with my camera for a while, came home, faffed around downloading images then eventually going out again to take a few more. Altogether a very satisfying day.

The bus dropped her off just before 5 and I settled her in the living room with her tea (tuna sarnie, Blue Riband, jam tart) which she did make a valiant effort to eat despite doing most of it with her eyes shut and dozing off occasionally.

Once again she had real problems swallowing her tablets, she's taking enough water in and sort of swishing it around but not actually swilling the pills down with it. So we get:

Sip - Swill Swill - Swallow

[burp]

CRUNCH CRUNCH


and then naturally she wants to spit them out because they taste vile. So more sips and swallows and yet more crunching. It's taking approximately half a dozen attempts to get rid of all the bits which is horrible and distressing for her. I need to check with the surgery if I can crush some or all of them into something to make it easier for her *makes mental note to phone tomorrow*

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Today's blip and the best of the rest here

A Quiet Day

We had a fairly early start this morning (5am) which was solved by offering a cup of tea in bed and allowed me to have a bit more duvet hugging.

Once the day got going she was very quiet and didn't actually leave her bedroom until nearly midday, just sat or lay on the bed sometimes talking, sometimes rocking, sometimes at the window knocking but little or no distress.

She's eaten well today - toast and jam, corned beef crispbake and baked beans, cake, chicken thigh, mash and carrot and turnip. Not huge portions of course, but nearly as much as a toddler would eat. Enormously satisfying for me though. It's 18:30 now and she is ready for bed, I hope she doesn't fall out again. Another night another problem swallowing her tablets, if this continues I will have to ask if I can crush them into something - apple sauce or yoghurt (Angel Delight? Butterscotch only mind you. The one true Angel D)

Recently food and drink tend to go all over the place so today, after two full changes of clothes (one was a whole mug of coffee, the other was just beans/mash/cake/tea) I have ordered a new cup with a spout and a tabard to wear at the table. Hopefully that will help a little with the laundry overload.

Tomorrow is day centre day and an email from Barry today tells me that he's requested a second day for her which will be marvellous and he's also organised a week in respite from next Friday (10th) which is equally marvellous. That takes us to the 18th Feb which is practically Spring.

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Very cold here today with a light scattering of snizzle (snow + drizzle = snizzle) so we didn't venture out of the door. Well, I say we. I dashed to the post office to get Betsy's pension for her but that was it. So... no outside opportunities for my photos today. I did this instead :)

Monday Calling

Hello hello hello!

I had a lovely weekend away, but why is it always over so quickly? We went here on Saturday where I took a nice photo of a swan and some narrow boats etc. and then out and about on Sunday where I didn't take a great photo of the beautiful medieval Ashleworth Tithe Barn because I'd forgotten to put the memory card in my camera and had to rely on the rubbish camera on my phone...

Back home this morning. Ma seems quite wobbly today and Peter says he's encouraged her to use her zimmer frame over the weekend. Hopefully she'll use it properly now rather than carrying it around... She is rambling a lot at the moment, making little to no sense and is a bit on the agitated side but seems content enough to get up off the sofa, take a couple of steps then go and sit down again.

It's been a struggle to get her to eat half a sandwich for lunch and I need to go and get some supplies in so a trip out in the car is looking likely. Daunting, but likely. Not sure how easy Ma will be.

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My cousin has had surgery to repair his carotid artery. He is still critically ill, naturally, but it's a step in the right direction. Thank you for all the messages, prayers and kind thoughts. Very much appreciated.

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No trip out on account of Ma confusing a slice of coffee and walnut cake for the house phone (which didn't ring and wasn't even in the room) and shouting 'Hello?!?' into it for some reason. I didn't think she was really up for a trip to Tesco Hell. We had a slight hiatus when taking her night meds and it took nearly two glasses of water to get them down. I've mentioned before how much Ma 'loves' water, so you can imagine how easy that was. Then to top it off, an hour after going to bed she ended up on the floor again. Pete did mention that she'd fallen a few times this weekend and this falling out of bed thing is becoming a bit of a regular occurrence. Maybe a call to the GP might be an idea. If nothing else it always pops my wrists out a bit trying to get her up and too much of that is really not good.

Early bed for me I think. Wasn't awfully well yesterday and still not feeling great today.

Did manage a quick blip though.

What do you mean addicted?!?

Thursday Catch-Up

I cant believe it's Thursday already! I've been very lax this week on the blogging front, so... where were we?

Tuesday

So the 'keep Ma awake until a decent bedtime' plan worked quite well in the end. It was nearly 8 before she went to bed and disregarding a couple of attempts to party the night away, she slept through the night.

We were up at a reasonable time, breakfasted, showered and managed a trip to the post office early doors before the Vicar arrived at 10:30. He is a Chaplain to the Sovereign and it putting together a photographic history as a gift to HM for her jubilee - literally a one off publication. He's tracked down photographs of every Chaplain from the reign of King George V onwards and needs someone to help catalogue and input the data on each one *dons Librarian hat*. It sounds dull but is actually quite fascinating and many of the photographs are fabulous! We've got one on a camel, one in a racing car etc. Anyway, we focussed on that for around three hours and Ma dozed on the sofa. Clearly her new medication is having an effect in the mornings.

By 2 o'clock we'd both had enough data crunching and Ma was beginning to stir so Hugh dashed off (that man never strolls anywhere) and I sorted food etc. then eventually we went for a short drive, mainly to get us out of the house in some fresh air for a little while. One of us was very reluctant.

Operation KMA didn't work so well this time. I couldn't keep her upright with eyes open so gave in at 6 and tucked her up. Then again at 6:45, 7:20, 8:30 etc. She did eventually settle at around midnight.

I photographed an iris for my blip. Love the colours.

Wednesday

Day centre day. So off she went at 10:30.

I shopped, snoozed and photographed an egg.

Yes I know it isn't normal but my goodness this photography thing is addictive. Eggs are tricky to do as it turns out but I think I got a reasonable shot in the end. I must learn how to use the photo software stuff though, that way bigger and better insanity lies.

The bus arrived at 17:05, I presented her with her tea which she couldn't work out how to eat (sandwiches, Blue Riband, yoghurt), but I think a lot of it was tiredness because I'd manage to get her to hold the biscuit only to watch her slide sideways with her eyes shut, bless her. So in bed by 17:30 and not a peep until 07:30 this morning.

An egg blip. Here's the best of the other ones I did.

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Thursday... Well, we had a good night overall and this morning was slow and fairly quiet. Ma was very sleepy again, even after she had been through the shower and had some breakfast. I shoved a colour on my hair (and waited until it started smoking.... I need to be blonde OK? Just let it go). Then I did some desultory hoovering and waved a cloth around. Barry came this afternoon and we discussed dates for rolling respite and it looks likely that it could start fairly soon. After he left we had a quick out and about in the car.

Did you do any blithery for the stamps?

Shall we get a fly going up?

I think I’d better do it when the port was there don't you?

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Came home, phone rang. Awful awful news about my cousin David. If you pray, please do so for him.

Here we go again - a very short update

Monday morning dawned. I say this with certainty because I was wide awake when it happened. This would be because Ma crashed about all night not settling in bed for any longer than 5 minutes at a time. Today she has dozed frequently but not for any prolonged period and therefore I am feeling a bit knackered.

My plan to keep her awake until 7:00 by turning the TV up has worked so well it's stirred her up to the point where she is pacing, shouting at people on the television, cushion worrying and door rattling. So not going to settle any time soon and I'm not rushing to get her to bed, it might pay off with a decent night in the long run. I can but hope!

She's eaten everything today - not a massive amount admittedly - but without any battles.

Every cloud.

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Today's blip and here's the others

Ps. I've corrected all the other Blip links so they should show the correct photograph for that day.

Crunchie Required

Another Friday dawns. Sorry I missed yesterday, it was quite a stressy, messy day with Ma on the whole. We went to Slattery's for a 90 minutes chocolate demonstration which was fascinating and then afternoon tea which was delicious. I think the demo was roughly 80 minutes too long for Ma though. She started off well but gradually slipped down in her seat to the point where I was worried she'd end up under the table. I showed absolutely no restraint with the afternoon tea which I think was justified because Ma didn't eat any of it.

When we got home she was very restless and continued to be so for the rest of the evening and into the small hours.

We are off to see the Dementia consultant for a three month review in a minute where I'm hoping to talk to Barry about setting up rolling respite for regular (hopefully monthly) weekends off.

More later.

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That was, without doubt, one of the worst mornings I've ever had since coming here. We set off ok and Ma was quiet on the journey into town. When we got to the car park there weren't any blue badge spaces so I had to get a ticket and I told Ma to stay in the car because it was raining quite heavily. Naturally she ignored me and tried to get out while still wearing her seat belt. This started a massive massive mood swing which began with her refusing to get out of the car. By the time we'd walked the 15 yards to the clinic door she was actively fighting to get away from me. Once in the clinic she didn't want to sit next to me, look at a magazine or talk to me. She preferred to hiss and spit and pinch whenever she was prevented from going out of the door/into the (occupied) consulting room etc. The rage on her face was frightening and really upsetting. During the consultation she was clearly very 'off' me but we got through it and in some ways her behaviour helped illustrate how she can be.

The upshot is that we are now on the community round so I won't have to drag her to the clinic any longer they will come to us instead, an increase in one medication and the introduction of another to help quell the hallucinations and therefore hopefully help her to sleep. Also the rolling respite idea has been raised again and I'm seeing Barry about that next week. Essentially it is a week of respite every 5 weeks (I think that's right). Marvellous.

We followed this with a trip to the supermarket. I know I was asking for trouble but we really needed food. I think I could've won Supermarket Sweep. Luckily the local Morries is only small so I could keep an eye on Ma stubbornly standing in the crossing aisle, turning her face away from any food suggestions as I flashed up and down.

Then to the doctor's surgery to drop off the new meds instructions where once again she was unable to stay in the car for two minutes. And finally back home. Where she is now dozing in the chair in front of The King's Speech.

I feel a little wrung out.

Messers P & G may arrive early this evening.

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Oops I forgot to link to yesterday's blip

You will be relieved to hear that it's lashing down outside and rather windy so you are saved from yet another droplet photo. It was hard enough yesterday - everytime I found one the ruddy wind blew it away! However, this does mean it's likely to be food. Very close up food.

Dementia Cafe Cook Book

This is a shameless appeal.

The Dementia Cafe is run by volunteers for sufferers of dementia and their carers. We meet once a month for coffee (and sometimes biscuits!) and either a fun activity like music and movement or for a talk or sometimes both. It provides the opportunity for sufferers to gain some much needed stimulation and contact with other people and gives the carers a safe place to talk to others who completely understand the issues we deal with and to share advice, experience etc. The wonderful Rachel has gathered a group of people together and produced a cook book to raise some funds for our little cafe. The recipes were road tested one day when folks descended on the community centre armed with whisks and spatulas, then everyone sat down and ate the results!

The book contains 12 recipes. Each recipe is in there because it is or was connected in some way to the world of dementia, either a sufferer or a carer. As I type this I've just realised that I don't know how much we are selling it for! I think the suggested donation is around £2.50 but will check that and correct as necessary.

If you would like to buy a cook book, or make a donation please email me at beeeze@gmail.com

Thank you