My mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2010. This is a blog about coming to terms with her absent mind.

Tuesday, 14 June 2011


It is really really difficult to strike the right balance between helping Ma to help herself and taking over. I am very aware of this and try very hard not to jump in immediately when her wheels appear to be spinning.

Today she was on a mission to go out for lunch which is fine and I do encourage it because it gets us out of the house for a few hours, it involves food and it isn't shopping. Several places were suggested and then rejected before she settled on a pub, the name of which she couldn't remember, but she was adamant that she knew where to find it. (insert sinking heart smiley here: 'We go up the road and along and it's on the side...) Unfortunately and fairly unsurprisingly we didn't find it but I did try, truly I did. The fact that we couldn't find it resulted in quite a few tears in the car and she was calling her self stupid and useless.

In the end we had a very nice lunch here:

somewhere I haven't been for about 30 years! Ma had fishcakes ('and a few chips' :D) and I had a cheeseburger sans bread with salad. During the meal she went from sobbing because the music wasn't anything Dad would know to dancing along in her chair to M People. It's a white-knuckle ride I tell you!


Just helped her to bed. She's convinced we are going somewhere tomorrow and I am not about to disabuse her of that notion. I'll deal with it in the morning.

However my ex-SIL is coming to take her out tomorrow (hopefully) so that will please her but obviously I haven't told Ma to avoid the 05:30 start and sitting on the edge of her seat for five hours.


  1. Well done, Bee. Tighten the safety belt and survive the ride. All life is a roller coaster - but yours at the moment is pure Alton Towers!!

  2. Thanks MA - it's a cheeky ride that's for sure!