My mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2010. This is a blog about coming to terms with her absent mind.

Thursday, 25 August 2011


She is in a most peculiar mood today. First thing she was all fluffy, saying goodbye to the children and telling Harriet she adored her. Harriet made a wry little comment to me about going from villain to hero which was quite amusing. I left Ma in the capable hands of the Reablement team and took the children to the bus station. Cue quite a lot of sobbing and embarrassing behaviour but they are quite used to it so shovelled me back into the car and waved me off.

When I got back she was dressed and sitting in the lounge. I made some tea and put the TV on and all was well for a while. Glenys phoned, I offered to make her some lunch (declined) and then she dozed in front of Mel and Gino.

For the last hour we've had tears and flailing arms which all started with her not being able to see if Sheila is in - this is due to the way the houses are oriented not because I've stopped her from going anywhere! We went through everyone she thought she needed to see and I reassured her that she has seen all of them within the last few weeks. From this we went to her telling me to go and spend some time with my 'husband', when I said he wasn't here she didn't believe me and kept telling me to go and do whatever I wanted to do (sit here and do exactly what I am doing which is read a book, actually). This moved seamlessly into asking for permission to go to the loo and then standing in the hall because she 'didn't want to be in the way'. When I suggested she went for a nap she refused but went and sat on the edge of the bed. More weeping, more arm flailing (and an accidental slap to my left eye) until I managed to persuade her to have a cup of coffee and a rest. As I was plumping up her pillows I discovered a stash of Celebrations in her pillow case...

She's mentioned that she'd like 'a few chips' for tea, which I will gladly do and perhaps she'll have an egg to go with them.

As I'm typing this I can hear her singing in the bedroom.


A few chips turned out to be 2, which she ate with the yolk from a poached egg. Add that to the crumpet this morning and we're hardly talking over indulgence here. I'm currently trying to keep her up until the evening shift arrives to help her to bed but it's going to be nip and tuck.


We made it to 6pm. The girls arrived and Ma was helped to bed etc.

Just chatting on the phone to the Cornishman (19:25) when the door opened and the zimmer frame clarts into view. Ma got bored with bed and is up again. Now sitting on the sofa with Lily in a death grip. There may be a tricky night in store.

1 comment:

  1. Oh, Lord. Move the breakables! Could you sneak her a food supplement (chocolate flavoured, maybe)? You're sure she's not stashing chips under the pillow, too? Ugh. :) x