My mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2010. This is a blog about coming to terms with her absent mind.

Monday, 10 October 2011

Bundles of Joy

Another common behaviour often seen in dementia sufferers is folding, sorting or stacking things over and over again. My aunt moved boxes around on the table top, Ma bundles things up. Everything from a tissue to a coat to a duvet is bundled up then set down very carefully and stroked. Obviously I feel the need to fold things properly which means that essentially I'm displaying the same behaviour! As fast as I fold things properly I turn around and they're bundled up again...


The tv continues to confuse. You wouldn't think that this would be much of a problem until you see how distressed she gets about it. We've just had a storm of tears because she didn't know where to go, what to take or how to get to Dickinson's Real Deal. Everytime I explain that it isn't real, it's like watching a film she says 'Yes, ok.' Then five minutes later we start all over again. However, when I turn the television off to stop the cycle she becomes morose and surly, cries herself into a doze then wakes up all fluffy. So at the moment each day is a sort of merry-go-round of bundling, confusion, crying, sulking, snoozing, fluffiness.


Would you like something to eat Ma?

Yes. Not a lot though.

I know

I'll have a bit of cheese on toast


And some bacon


Oh and that banana thing


And a glass of wine...


I seem to have started something. I ordered Ma a couple of roll neck fleece tops from Cotton Traders and got myself a fleece hooded poncho thing (£10 in the sale). Guess who is wearing the poncho?

So that's a long-sleeved thermal vest, fleece roll neck, fleece jacket and now a fleece poncho. Plus somehow the much derided (initially) fleece pj bottoms have appeared. However.... she isn't huddled under the heated throw. Thank goodness. The very thought of that makes me feel ill.

We are road-testing a bit of Bacardi Breezer tonight. She constantly asks for wine but doesn't like it when I offer it to her. Rather than keep buying sweeter wines in an attempt to find something she likes, I thought this was a flash of genius.

The jury is still out.

I do actually think that there probably isn't an alcoholic drink she will like now and avoid it as much as possible but every now and then she gets stuck in a loop about it. At these times it is easier on my sanity to pander to her wishes. As I type she's had about a small sherry glass worth so we aren't talking a rapid descent into alcoholism.


I love the stats bit on this thing, it's fascinating. I wonder how someone in Russia (v popular there for some reason) or Egypt happens upon this particular blog. Also the search criteria used on Google makes me laugh sometimes - that bruise on my leg is regularly used by someone to get in here! Weekend traffic is generally quieter as you would expect and the most popular post of all time is the one containing pics of Ma and Pa on Ma's 80th birthday.

Well I think it's fascinating. Trust me, I'd go out more if I could... :)


  1. Mum is a compulsive folder and stacker. If nothing else it makes sure that I put things away myself for fear of never seeing them again!

  2. Ma insisted on taking her breakfast things out to the kitchen this morning. Eventually found them in the cupboard under the sink in the bathroom...