My mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2010. This is a blog about coming to terms with her absent mind.

Thursday, 6 October 2011

Day Centre Woes

We had another disturbed night resulting in me having to be a bit firm about staying in bed and going to sleep at around 4am.

Up, dressed and breakfasted and within half an hour of the bus arriving I casually started getting her ready to go. When the penny dropped all hell broke loose. Tears, mutinous refusal to put on a coat, she was ill, would I ring David and Glenys and tell them where she would be, where was Peter, my father would be appalled at what I was doing to her etc. etc. I stayed calm (she really knows how to push my buttons!) but firm and when the bus arrived with heels dragging, sobs and backward glances she went.

As I closed the front door I heard her say to the driver 'Oh I remember you! You were really nice to me.'


With the rain and wind lashing against my bedroom window, a warm duvet and Food Network on in the background I slept.


I was quite apprehensive about how she would be when she got home, with good reason as it turned out.

A repeat of last week really, with the zimmer frame thrown in my direction and a slump into the chair in tears. No sign of the tea I'd paid for though but at least this week I haven't had to peel a ham sandwich off my head. She told me again that she was ill, that she would not be going back there ever again etc. I've repeated over and again quietly and calmly that it is good for her to go out and meet new people, it is good for her to have a change of scene, it is good for her to have some new stimulation.

However, she has calmed down more quickly this week and is now pointedly not eating chicken soup and toast - barely 45 minutes after getting home. Conversation is very confused and I dare say she'll be in bed before long.

More later perhaps.


Well it just goes to show - never assume. She has finally given in and gone to bed after watching Eastenders. Well, I say 'watch'. Obviously this was another sucks boo to you moment because she was nodding off all the way through.

Time for bed then Mum?

No not yet I'm watching this

Oh ok, only it's nearly 8 o'clock and you are usually in bed by half six

Pffft! I don't think so!


*gets into bed*

Brrr! It's cold!

I'll get you a hot water bottle

Oh no don't bother, there's no need

Well, no point being cold and if you're all warm and cosy perhaps you'll sleep properly and stay in bed all night?

Oh shouldn't think so...

I'm contemplating an Eastenders quiz and a padlock. Vindictive? Moi?!?

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