Me and My Big Mouth

Well that'll teach me.


Last night went something like this:

Helllooooooooo??!?

Hello Ma, it's bed time. Go back to bed now. I'll tuck you in.

Why am I in bed?

Because that's what we do at bedtime.

All these people said it's fine.

Oh good. Night then. Keep the noise down everyone.

[repeat every 40 minutes* until 07:00]

*insert swear words and insults to the 'crowd' keeping her up during the 02:10, 02:50, 03:30 and 04:10 episodes

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We did the Manchester Uni thing this morning which was fine, Ma didn't do well on her specific questions but was happy to sprinkle non sequiturs throughout the rest of the process. Thankfully Caroline has clearly seen and heard it all before and dealt with it really well.

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This afternoon wasn't so great. I had a hospital appointment so we had to be out of the house by 2pm. After over 24 hours of trying to leave the house Ma promptly decided that she didn't want to go out. She removed her shoes three times in five minutes and tried to get into bed (in her coat) several times. Eventually we made it to the car and off we went.

I'm gradually getting used to filtering the more nonsensical comments on automatic pilot rather than trying to work out what she's saying all the time - that way madness lies. But sometimes - sitting in a hospital waiting room for example - you can't avoid it. We hadn't been there more than two minutes before Ma was trying to leave and getting terribly anxious, talking about phantom people and events. Then while I was talking to the respiratory technician she kept trying to leave the room, so not a particularly relaxed appointment.

On the way home she wanted to go and see Mavis, which was fine because I'd already arranged for us to go up for a cuppa. Unfortunately she is unable to recognise where she is any longer so was convinced that we were 'there' every 500 yards or so and tried to get out of the car. At this rate I won't need Nice 'n' Easy Light Ash Blonde any longer.

She did call Peter 'Potato' at one point though which made me laugh quite a lot.

Of course we weren't at M&V's for more than the time it takes to make a cup of tea before she wanted to go. Mavis told her she must eat more and she said 'Yes, probably'.

Back home. Fish pie was refused, curling up on the sofa started at 17:10. I tried and tried to get her to sit up and chat but it wasn't possible. In bed by 17:25

I am about to go and look for a trumpet in the attic.

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Sorry if this is a bit scattered. I'm awfully tired.

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Today's Blip is another shot of the chocolate bars. Lazy perhaps but it's called 'Stairway to Heaven' and is possibly where I will be heading before too long.

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I did go into the attic to look for some photos. Not a trumpet. BUT did find a kazoo.

Now limp with hysteria at the thought of telling Ma and her imaginary friends to bugger off kazoo-style. If only I had a swanee whistle too...