Weekend 19/11

I could hear Ma talking to her imaginary friends from about 5am and they've been with us on and off throughout the day. I think it is probably the increase in medication and hopefully she will acclimatise, if not I'm speaking to the doctor early in the week so I will ask then. She's also been very difficult to understand today, absolutely nothing makes any sense and when you try to unravel things she goes off on a different tangent. Very frustrating and headache inducing.

The only really difficult time was in the shower this morning. She has suddenly forgotten how to wash herself so I had to do it. She took exception to me asking her to turn around so that we could wash the soap off and threw a soapy sponge into my face. But other than that (once my eyes were back to normal!) we haven't had the huge mood swings.

We had a trip to Morrisons for some milk and bread. We could've gone to the Coop but I thought it would fill a bit more time if we went a bit further. Unfortunately she is a bit of a menace in a busy supermarket because she tends to stand in the most in-the-way places annoying all and sundry.

Just before I dropped her off to see Mavis this afternoon she was working up to a crying session but when I mentioned where she was going the tears disappeared and she managed to stay there without me for 45 minutes.

Otherwise, a quiet day with not a lot to report. In bed at 6 after picking the middle out of a fish finger sandwich and eating half an egg custard tart. Nearly 100% more than she ate yesterday though.

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Some days are just not destined to be good ones. Today was one of them. There's nothing I can really put my finger on other than I missed out on a big party in Cheltenham last night (which made me feel hard done by) and Ma has been incredibly incoherent for days now, which is just so exhausting.

What would you like for tea?

Not much

Yes I know, but not much of what?

Not much of perfect.

This afternoon she couldn't remember that I'm her daughter, asked me if my father was coming to collect me and very slowly read and re-read the front of the Woman and Home Christmas magazine at least seven times. I went into the kitchen to get away from it. She followed me and brought the magazine with her...

Eventually I just had to go into the garden and have a bit of a moment. The dog came with me and sat stoically by my side while I sobbed for a few minutes then we both went back in and I made us both a cup of tea. She went to bed at half six but I've only got one sleeping tablet left so it might not be such a quiet night tonight.

'Perfect' turned out to be cheese and biscuits.

I am about to wallow in crap television for a few hours.